Sexual harassment in the workplace is wrong—plain and simple. Yet despite formal policies and growing awareness, many employees still struggle with how to respond to sexual harassment when it happens to them. This is especially true when the misconduct comes from a high-performing employee or executive. Employers often look the other way when the harasser brings in revenue or holds influence. And even when employees report the behavior, Human Resources may fail to act—or delay action—leaving the employee without a meaningful resolution.
This blog, authored by Matt Ruggles, draws on his 30+ years as an employment lawyer in California to guide employees who are being sexually harassed at work. It provides clear, practical steps to help you document the misconduct, navigate your company’s internal procedures, and protect your rights under California law.
If you are trying to determine whether you should file a lawsuit for sexual harassment while you are still employed or after separating from your current employer, read our companion blog titled “Should I File a Sexual Harassment Lawsuit While I Am Still Employed?“ for additional guidance.
What Is Sexual Harassment?
Under California’s Fair Employment and Housing Act (FEHA), it is unlawful for an employer to permit sexual harassment in the workplace. Government Code § 12940(j) specifically prohibits two primary forms of sexual harassment: quid pro quo harassment and hostile work environment harassment.
Quid Pro Quo Harassment:
This occurs when a supervisor or manager conditions a job benefit—such as a raise, promotion, or continued employment—on submission to unwelcome sexual conduct. A defining feature of quid pro quo harassment is the superior/subordinate relationship.
Example: A supervisor tells an employee that she will receive a bonus only if she agrees to go on a date with him. If she declines and the bonus is later withheld, that may constitute quid pro quo harassment.
Hostile Work Environment Harassment:
This form of harassment arises when unwelcome conduct based on sex or gender becomes so severe or pervasive that it interferes with an employee’s ability to do their job or creates an intimidating, hostile, or offensive work environment. It may be perpetrated by supervisors, coworkers, clients, or even vendors. Unlike quid pro quo harassment, it does not require a tangible employment action.
Examples of conduct that may contribute to a hostile work environment include:
-
- Repeated sexual jokes or innuendos, even if framed as “just kidding.”
- Persistent comments about an employee’s body, clothing, or attractiveness.
- Sharing or displaying sexually explicit images, memes, or messages in the workplace.
- Unwanted physical contact, such as touching, rubbing, or brushing up against someone.
- Staring or leering in a sexually suggestive way.
- Making demeaning comments about a person’s gender, sexual orientation, or gender identity.
- Spreading sexual rumors or making offensive remarks about someone’s private life.
- Sending unwanted romantic or sexual messages via email, text, or internal chat platforms.
- Repeatedly asking someone out after they’ve made it clear they are not interested.
Example: A male employee regularly comments on his female coworker’s clothing, makes jokes about her sex life during team meetings, and once attempted to massage her shoulders without consent. Although each incident alone might not seem extreme, taken together and occurring over time, this pattern of behavior may constitute a hostile work environment.
What Isn’t Sexual Harassment?
Not all inappropriate or unpleasant workplace behavior qualifies as sexual harassment under California law. For conduct to rise to the level of unlawful harassment, it must be based on sex or gender and be either severe or pervasive enough to alter the terms and conditions of employment.
Isolated or minor incidents—such as a one-time offhand comment, a single inappropriate joke, or an awkward remark—generally do not meet the legal threshold. Similarly, having a rude, demanding, or abrasive boss does not, by itself, constitute sexual harassment. Unless the behavior is specifically tied to sex, gender, or sexual conduct, it will likely be viewed as non-actionable under the law.
Examples of conduct that is likely not sexual harassment:
- A manager who frequently yells at all employees, regardless of gender
- A coworker who is generally sarcastic or dismissive but does not make sexually charged comments
- Being excluded from meetings or projects without any connection to sex or gender
- A tense or competitive work environment caused by high performance expectations
Here are the Steps to Respond to Sexual Harassment
Step #1: Create a Detailed Timeline and Preserve All Evidence
Start by documenting every incident you believe constitutes sexual harassment. Write down exactly what was said or done, who was involved, the date, time, and location, and whether anyone witnessed the behavior. Use clear, factual language and avoid generalizations. Your timeline should be as detailed and chronological as possible.
In addition to your timeline, preserve every piece of evidence—including emails, text messages, internal chat logs, photos, or screenshots. Keep your own contemporaneous notes summarizing what happened after each incident, ideally written the same day. These notes can significantly strengthen your credibility if the issue escalates.
Important: California law prohibits recording a conversation without the consent of all parties involved. Do not record any conversations unless you have prior written or verbal consent from everyone participating.
Example Entry:
“On March 3, 2024, during a staff meeting, my supervisor, John Smith, said, ‘You’d get more clients if you wore tighter skirts,’ in front of the entire team. Jane Doe and Michael Lee were present. Both looked visibly uncomfortable.”
Step #2: Identify a “Cast of Characters”
Create a list of all individuals connected to the incidents—this includes the person engaging in the misconduct, any witnesses, supervisors, coworkers, and HR representatives. For each person, note their job title, reporting relationship (e.g., whether they supervise you or are supervised by the harasser), and any details that may affect their credibility, such as whether they were present for relevant events or have a history of similar complaints.
Example:
- John Smith – Sales Manager (my direct supervisor and the alleged harasser)
- Jane Doe – Coworker, same level; was present at multiple meetings where inappropriate comments were made
- Michael Lee – HR Manager; received my initial verbal report
- Susan Alvarez – Senior Vice President of Sales; oversees both me and John Smith
Step #3: Review the Employee Handbook
Locate and carefully read your company’s employee handbook. Most policies prohibiting harassment are found near the beginning, often under sections titled “Equal Employment Opportunity,” “Workplace Conduct,” or “Anti-Harassment Policy.” Pay close attention to how the company defines harassment, what conduct is prohibited, and—most importantly—what procedures you are expected to follow when reporting misconduct.
Step #4: Communicate Directly with the Offender
Before reporting the conduct to HR, make a respectful and professional attempt to address the issue directly with the person involved. If you feel safe doing so, speak to them in person or over the phone in a calm, businesslike tone. The purpose is to let them know their behavior is unwelcome and ask them to stop.
After the conversation, send a short follow-up email to confirm what was discussed. This creates a written record of your objection and shows that you took reasonable steps to resolve the issue informally, as most harassment policies require.
Your message should:
- Clearly identify the specific conduct
- Politely ask the person to stop
- Reference the company’s anti-harassment policy
Avoid labeling the behavior as “sexual harassment” or assigning bad intent. Stay focused on the conduct, not the person’s character. Do not threaten to report them—simply referencing the company’s policy sends that message professionally.
Example of a verbal conversation:
“Hi Alex, I wanted to bring something to your attention. The comment you made yesterday about how I looked in my outfit made me uncomfortable. I’d appreciate it if you didn’t make personal remarks like that going forward. I know the company encourages a respectful workplace, and I’m just trying to maintain that.”
Example follow-up email:
Subject: Follow-Up on Our Conversation
Hi Alex,
I just wanted to follow up on our brief conversation earlier. As I mentioned, I was uncomfortable with your comment during yesterday’s team meeting. I’m asking that you please refrain from making personal remarks going forward. The company’s policy encourages a respectful and professional environment, and I appreciate your understanding.
Thank you
Step #5: Submitting a Complaint to HR
If the behavior continues after your direct request to stop, you must file a written complaint with HR, following the procedures set out in the handbook.
Once you’ve reviewed the policies, determine who is responsible for receiving internal complaints. Prepare your written complaint carefully. It should:
- Include dates, facts, and specific examples of misconduct.
- Focus on how the conduct violates the company’s internal harassment policy.
- Avoid citing legal violations—focus on company rules.
- Be dated and signed.
- If possible, include a deadline for the company to respond.
Most companies are legally obligated to investigate all good-faith internal complaints that allege violations of their own anti-harassment policies.
Step #6: Participate in Good Faith During the Investigation
Once the company begins its investigation, you must fully cooperate. This may involve participating in multiple interviews and sharing documents. Keeping detailed notes up to this point will make your participation more accurate and effective.
Step #7: Produce Records If Requested
If the company asks for documents or other information, provide them as requested. Keep copies of everything you submit. Do not alter original documents. PDF format is preferred to preserve the integrity of your records.
Step #8: Conclusion of the Internal Investigation
At the conclusion of the investigation, the company is required to provide you with a summary of findings and explain what action, if any, was taken to remediate the harassment. This means they must inform you what was done to correct the problem. However, you are not entitled to view the entire investigation file, notes, or internal records unless those materials are subpoenaed in a future lawsuit.
Step #9: Seek Legal Advice If You’re Not Satisfied
If the company’s response is inadequate, if the harassment continues, or if you feel that your concerns weren’t taken seriously, it’s time to consult an employment lawyer. Not just any lawyer will do—sexual harassment cases involve complex legal standards under California law, strict filing deadlines, and detailed procedural requirements. An employment lawyer understands how to navigate these issues, identify employer violations, and build a strong legal strategy based on your specific circumstances.
Employment lawyers also know how companies defend these claims and can anticipate tactics designed to minimize or dismiss your complaint. They understand how to value your claim, preserve key evidence, and position your case for the best possible outcome—whether through settlement, administrative proceedings, or litigation.
If you’re facing unresolved sexual harassment at work, contact Matt Ruggles at the Ruggles Law Firm for a confidential consultation to evaluate your legal options.
What if I Can’t Find an Employment Lawyer to Represent Me?
If, after making a real and sustained effort to hire an attorney, you are unable to retain counsel, you may file a harassment claim with the California Civil Rights Department (CRD) (formerly the Department of Fair Employment and Housing). The statute of limitations is three years from the date of the last incident of harassment. However, waiting too long can weaken your case, even if you’re technically within the deadline.
Important: Do not file your claim with the EEOC. Federal law (Title VII) is far more limited in scope and remedies than California’s Fair Employment and Housing Act (FEHA).
If you’re facing sexual harassment at work, know that you’re not alone—and you don’t have to navigate this process without support. Taking smart, strategic steps from the beginning can make all the difference in protecting your rights and building a strong case.
FREQENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT RESPONDING TO SEXUAL HARASSMENT AT WORK
Can I report sexual harassment if the person harassing me is not my supervisor?
Yes. While quid pro quo harassment requires a superior/subordinate relationship, hostile work environment harassment can be committed by anyone in the workplace—coworkers, clients, or third parties—so long as the conduct is severe or pervasive enough to affect your working conditions.
Do I have to confront the person harassing me before going to HR?
Yes, if possible. Before reporting to HR, you should attempt to communicate your objection directly to the person engaging in the behavior. Keep the tone professional and reference the company’s internal harassment policy. This step strengthens your position if the conduct continues and you later escalate the issue.
What should I include in my written complaint to HR?
Focus on facts. Describe the specific conduct, dates of incidents, and how it violates the company’s harassment policy. Avoid citing legal statutes. Include your signature, the date, and a reasonable deadline for HR to respond if you can.
What if HR doesn’t do anything or I’m not satisfied with the outcome?
If the company’s investigation and remedial actions are inadequate or the harassment continues, you should consult with an employment lawyer. If you cannot retain counsel after making a good-faith effort, you may file a complaint with the California Civil Rights Department (CRD).
How long do I have to file a sexual harassment claim in California?
You have three years from the date of the last incident to file a claim with the California Civil Rights Department (CRD). However, waiting too long may weaken your claim, even if it’s still within the statute of limitations.
Should I file with the EEOC instead of the CRD?
No. In almost all cases, filing with the CRD is the better option for California employees. California’s Fair Employment and Housing Act (FEHA) provides stronger protections and broader remedies than federal law (Title VII), which is enforced by the EEOC.
Conclusion
Sexual harassment in the workplace is a serious issue—and no one should have to endure it in silence. While many companies have policies prohibiting harassment, enforcement is often inconsistent, especially when high-level employees are involved. Taking proactive, thoughtful steps—such as documenting the conduct, reviewing internal policies, and following the correct reporting procedures—can make a significant difference in protecting your rights.
Contact the Ruggles Law Firm at 916-758-8058 to Evaluate Your Potential Lawsuit
Matt Ruggles has a thorough understanding of California employment laws and decades of practical experience litigating employment law claims in California state and federal courts. Using all of his knowledge and experience, Matt and his team can quickly evaluate your potential claim and give you realistic advice on what you can expect if you sue your former employer.
Contact the Ruggles Law Firm at 916-758-8058 for a free, no obligation consultation.
Blog posts are not legal advice and are for information purposes only. Contact the Ruggles Law Firm for consideration of your individual circumstances.
